December 2001
An ex-colleague in Canada sent me this and I hope you find it as amusing as I did.
"Never let it be said that ground crews and engineers lack a sense of humour.
Here are some actual logged maintenance complaints and problems, known As" squawks," submitted by QUANTAS pilots and the solution recorded by Maintenance engineers. By the way Quantas is the only major airline that has never had an accident.
P = the problem logged by the pilot.
S = the solution and action taken by the engineers.
-------------------------------------
P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.
P: Test flight OK, except auto land very rough.
S: Auto land not installed on this aircraft.
P: No. 2 propeller seeping prop fluid.
S: No. 2 propeller seepage normal. Nos. 1, 3 and 4 propellers lack
normal seepage.
P: Something loose in cockpit.
S: Something tightened in cockpit.
P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on backorder.
P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200-fpm descent.
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.
P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.
P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.
P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S: That's what they're there for!
P: IFF inoperative.
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.
P: Suspected crack in windscreen.
S: Suspect you're right.
P: Number 3 engine missing.
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.
P: Aircraft handles funny.
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.
P: Target radar hums.
S: Reprogrammed target radar with words.
P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed." Read more
I am going to have a look at a 95 scorpio 2.5 td ultima tomorrow, not the vm engine i dont think. Any coments or suestions on what to look for? What mpg could i expect? Anyone had one ? What was it like Thanks! Read more
We have an 825 Diesel which our workshops service with 190,000 miles recorded.
This engine is not going to set the world alight, but it is a very capable engine.
Some will tell of head gasket failure (individual gaskets for each cylinder) but I haven't seen anything yet.
Don't expect much more than 30MPGish from this olde-worlde IDI engine.
Rgds
David
I had reason to telephone Royal Sun Alliance about my car insurance.
I was given a number by Directory Enquiries. I got through and immediately had to press 5, then I was given 3 options (I pressed the relevant one) I was given 4 options (I pressed the relevant one), I was given 3 options (I pressed the relevant one), I was given 3 options (I pressed the relevant one) and arrived at the switchboard who promptly put me hold, then came back and said the department I wanted was busy - so what was all the button pressing and choice selecting about? She gave me a direct number to call. I tried it and got through to the wrong department. "Shall I transfer you...?" NOT ON YOUR LIFE MISSUS".
To my mind big companies just don't want to talk to their customers anymore. The bigger the company the more blocks are placed in the way of callers
This automatic telephone answering and re-directing has gone too far. I resign. Read more
Isn't that where Cabbages and Condoms is near ?
ownder which of the major fuel companies will be the first on the UK market to comply. i understand that fuel in Germany is already of a lower if not zero Sulphur level.
and will Fat Gordon be tinkering with the tax levels.....AGAIN
taken from www.eubusiness.com/item/66429
Sulphur-free petrol mandatory from 2005
The introduction of sulphur-free fuel will be mandatory in EU member states from 1 January 2005, and its use mandatory from 1 January 2009, following political agreement by the Environment Council on 12 December. Sulphur-free fuels are expected to speed up introduction of modern fuel-efficient technologies in cars and other vehicles.
Sulphur-free diesel will be mandatory from 2009 subject to a review by the Commission in 2005. "...these fuels will help clean up the emissions of older more polluting vehicles and improve air quality for people throughout the European Union", sais Environment Commissioner Margot Wallstrom following the agreement.
Sulphur in fuel degrades the performance of exhaust after-treatment devices such as catalytic converters. The removal of sulphur from petrol and diesel will enable new automotive technologies to be optimised further, and will lead to significant reductions in emissions of carbon dioxide Read more
The crap you buy in the UK could not be sold in the rest of main land europe,its no wonder you need injection cleaners etc unheard of in Germany.My fuel consumption in my BMW runs at 9.7litres /100km on my last visit to the UK it rose to 11.3 and I was driving slower.Blame the refiners they have been getting away with murder for years in the UK
I'm using a SWB Transit van to get to S.Wales from Abingdon (south of Oxford). The bridge tolls are going to be £8:70. I can avoid the bridge by going across country - takes longer than going down the M4, not much more miles though (app: 100 v 90). Is the Transit likely to drink £8:70 worth of extra fuel due to the none motorway type road? - it will be unladden on the way. Having not used a big van or diesel much I'm not too sure of the effect on mpg of winding roads and dealing with traffic.
Anyone who uses a Transit regularly on Mway and winding country roads have any suggestions?
Piers Read more
Piers
It depends which part of South Wales you are going. I always use the A40from Oxford then the little B4221 (I think) which takes you on the Newent by-pass straight to the M50. You then have Motorway or dual carrigeway road all the way to the M4 in Newport.
By the way I find going over the Birdlip in order to miss Cheltenham is a worthwhile exersize.
In Germany last week the results of camara tests were published showing that all camaras were inaccurate,some giving different readings even though the pass speed was the same,Some camaras were giving reflections of walls and almost doubling the real speed.But the biggest problem was the angle that they were set at, a small deviation in the Azimuth and direction created a variety of in correct readings.This problem is now becoming a national scandel with both the police and engineers agreeing that there is a massive problem.
Something to think about because the camaras commonly used in the UK are not as accurate as the German camaras according to their spec.It must also be said that the results were as often in the drivers favour as the otherway round.
On my return trip from Essen to Dresden yesterday I noticed many had covers on them and others without doubt turned off. Read more
A metal bin lid used as a Frisbee will set off a Gatso.
I been playing with my own radar gun and got some very interesting effects.
1, Pointing it at a sign, no speed until a lorry thunders by, the vibration gave me a readings
2, Pointing it at a speaker with music or voice playing, speeds of 100mph plus
The results we came upon was that any vibration caused spoof readings.
So to test it further, we mounted a metal plate on a speaker, turned up the volume and dove past the gun at 30mph with the boot open and the speaker pointing back, the gun gave speeds of over 100mph.
Seems that any vibration will effect radar, that could be as simple as a metallic object on your car vibrating and upsetting the gun.
Lorries with flat backs will also give odd readings and the police have confirmed this when they sent a NIP to a driver that knew he was doing 2mph but they said he was over the 30mph limit.
Steve
www.ukspeedtraps.co.uk
Did anybody read that the factory had ceased production because nobody will supply them parts.They have no money to pay any bills and all the production staff have been laid off.What price a new Daewoo? Read more
In Dundee Arnold Clark has taken over Daewoo from the Halfords annexe. On whether that might be an improvement I will not comment without legal advice! However, it very strongly suggests that Daewoo is still reckoned to be an earner.
We had two. Heather found them very comfortable, but they were not driver's cars, to me. Though the head saleman in the Proton Agency (also Skoda) ran about in our Leganza for a while after trade-in, and presumably he had a choice. If you are seeking a cheap half-decent second hand car, they are worth a look, in my opinion.
Apart from this alleged fraud, the factory suffered from what sounded very like traditional UK union problems - thus carrying cribbing from GM a bit too far?
You have to have car insurance.
You have to pay insurance premium tax when you get insurance.
Therefore if you don't have insurance and drive a car you are not only breaking the law, but evading the payment of the tax.
As the police don't seem too interested in uninsured drivers - 'they are a "problem" is what I was helpfully informed' - isn't it about time Customs and Excise cracked down on them?
Piers Read more
yea, dunno if its still the same now, but on motorbikes you could get an "any bike" policy limited to X cc
The bigger the engine you wanted to drive the more you paid, but it covered u for any bike up to that limit
Quite good for people who like to try their mates bikes out etc
Dont see why the same couldnt apply to cars
Obviously you need to have a mechanism for insuring the thing when no one is driving it
How much should I pay a garage for a 96N Hyundai 1.5 s-coupe MVI SE with 38k on the clock and in good nick??, My missus has set her heart on it but I think the asking price of £2999 is way too much??, What should I offer and what is the best tactic to barter with a car salesman (Im ok at getting money off private sales but never seem to get anywhere with salesman!!)
Help!
Thanks in advance Read more
These are very rare but wouldn't say particularly desirable so Persuade your Mrs that she'd be better off with a nice VW Corrado - these have stopped depreciating now so would be better long -term buy and the insurance won't cost any more. You should find a decent H-J reg one for 3 grand
Guy,
Possibly as worthy a topic for backroomers comment as we've seen. I bet loads of folks here know the pressures involved, as you and a couple more have posted.
Serious business with ten folks killed, loads injured and some involved issues about where responsibilities for any one persons actions might end.
Yet again the "harmless" LAS pulls the rug out from under the forum.
I have some serious points to make on the sleep/work/driving issue. Never mind, another time.
Feel free to delete this Martyn if you want to "tidy up" on this one.
David Read more
Sadly - I've noticed that tiredness creeps up more quickly when driving these days (being 50) I am as fit as a fiddle and have a reasonable level of physical fitness and stamina. In the heady days when I would work twenty hours at a stretch and drive home in the early hours of the morning - including making progress at those times (I have a story about a funny incident with a Police T5 one very early morning...). I feel that we age quicker than we realize. A couple of years ago I rode up to North Wales from Brugges (in bad weather) - I made a potentially serious mistake at one point with 40 miles still to run - foolishly I carried on, the weather got really bad in that 40 miles - I got to where I was going safely but no thanks to my own risk taking...1- times worse on a bike when tired, but at least the signs kick in sooner.
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I first saw a version of this list in the 60s when I was flying with the CAP as a Cadet... It was then referenced to a National Guard transport (MAC) unit that was still flying Recips (hence the one about the missing engine) when it crops up now it tends to have an airline name attached to it.
~R