Reflecting on another year of HJ membership and posts I have decided it could go on forever as when you think the embers are dying a ?well worn? subject will come along and keep it alive!
Here in no particular order are my top 20
1. Petrol v Diesel
2. Auto v Manual
3. Oil change regularity
4. Tyre choice
5. Insurance
6. Speed cameras
7. Global Warming
8. VWs are rubbish
9. French cars are rubbish
10. Drivers of (insert car make here - usually BMW, sometimes vans, 4x4s etc) are all crazy fools
11. Everyone should buy a Mondeo
12. Lights. Their use, lack of use including how long it takes to change them
13. Middle lane hoggers
14. Outside lane hoggers
15. HGVs as roadblocks
16. Main dealers are useless
17. Which car to buy (refer to 11 regardless of vehicle requirements)
18. Road pricing and congestion
19. Fuel costs
20. FWD v RWD v AWD
Over to you to add the next 10 of subjects which can always get a response regardless of how often they are raised.
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21. Lists of things
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< Ulla>
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I believe The Queen delivers a message to her well-worn subjects on Christmas Day... :-)
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Thought the most obvious one would be supermarket fuel vs premium fuels?
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2007 Seat Altea XL 2.0 TDI (140) Stylance
2005 Skoda Fabia vrS
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24. Why was the motorway closed for four hours? Never mind the fact people died and lives were ruined - I missed my train!
25. Look at this police officer who's been done for speeding/drink driving - surely he should be practically perfect in every way, even when he's off duty. Off with his head!
26. I'm leaving, I hate this place and the moderators are rubbish.
27. I'm back.
28. I'm leaving, I hate this place and the moderators are rubbish.
29. I'm back... etc etc
30. I've been caught speeding, how can I get out of it, despite the fact I was speeding?
Edited by PoloGirl on 19/12/2007 at 14:08
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31. I want a car which has XYZ, so please help me find one with none of these, or maybe a Mondeo :-)
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32. Anything fitted with a TDCi is the work of Satan.
Edited by PoloGirl on 19/12/2007 at 14:16
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Can't believe you forgot the most contentious discussion of all
33: Left-foot braking v the incorrect method
Edited by Big Bad Dave on 19/12/2007 at 14:20
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34. Classic cars are brilliant!
No they're not, they're rubbish. If they were any good people would still be using them. Instead it's taken 20 years of constant tinkering and overhauls to get yours actually working so you can depend on it getting you back from Sainsbury's without a team of singing car mechanics on standby.
Hawkeye
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Stranger in a strange land
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34. Running a diesel on cooking oil.
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Based on last weeks gastromic delights, I think my local chippy is using Diesel in his chip fryer.
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< Ulla>
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Number 27, Clarkson seen in diesel Citroen ..........
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Number 27 - BRoomers who cant count.
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< Ulla>
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36. Tailgating.
Incidentally, how close does the tailgater have to be for it to classed as tailgating?
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37. Top Gear is rubbish. Oh no it's not! Oh yes it is! etc. etc etc.
Edited by Round The Bend on 19/12/2007 at 15:18
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37. I've received a parking ticket. How do I get away with it even though I admit to having been parked illegally?
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L\'escargot.
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38. Any piece of automotive technology introduced after about 1991 is witchcraft/inherently unreliable/step too far/too complicated/don't look English/whatever.
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You too eh?
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39. If my company car emits 333mg of carbon per mile will I get more tax relief if I get one that emits 297mg of carbon per mile but falls in a different tax band if I agree not to use it on Sundays?
40. Did you know that if you press the left hand button twice then the right hand button three times on your Tom Tom One it will give tomorrow's weather forecast for the Outer Hebrides?
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41. I bought a black car. Can you tell me how to keep it clean and remove all the swirl marks?
42. My wiper blades are better than yours.
43. ABS
44. I like / hate my quick clear windscreen.
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69,781. Time travel - the 2025 Mondeo NDCI (nuclear dynamic combined induction) is brilliant.
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Yes but woe betide you if you use supermarket fissionable materials to run it.
26(a) BMW - Every negative stereotype about the brand and drivers. Usually from people who have never driven one.
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Yes but woe betide you if you use supermarket fissionable materials to run it.
No, no, it runs just as well on the Sainorrisonesco rods as the Shelexxonaco they just last a couple of decades less!
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Brilliantbit of ping pong Cheddar / PU ! . LOL
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Picture the scene in a workshop servicing Cheddar's car. Service Manager to Tech " I think the The guy nodding his heads at you has a fuel leak"
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>69,781. Time travel - the 2025 Mondeo NDCI (nuclear dynamic combined induction) is brilliant<
At last, Ford gets round to doing what Honda did in 2015...
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45. i want to buy a classic mini but cant be bothered with all the ferrous oxide ...help?
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46. Floor mats....especially if they are well worn.
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50 (I'm claiming 50th as some people above can't count....) Let's all meet in a pub somewhere between Wigan and Ashton-in-Makerfield, 7 miles off the B6666 next Tuesday 26th (which isn't a Tuesday).
51 I'm lost in Wigan and can't get out.
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Would well worn subjects constitute an immediate MOT failure?
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49. Subarus are God's own car.
50. Why can't everyone zip merge?
51. Brake lights on auto cars...my eyes, oh no , I'm blinded!
52. Which petrol pump is it best to use, the one nearest you when you drive in or the one furthest away?
53. Someone was beastly and horrid to me today, what should I do?
Edited by Webmaster on 23/12/2007 at 00:49
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54 why do grown men wear shorts in the winter
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55. Mercedes used to be great, then they were rubbish. Getting better now though!
56. BMW drivers not indicating
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Answer to Q54: Because all that fur makes their legs too hot otherwise.
Edited by Lud on 19/12/2007 at 23:32
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57: I am an offensive lout with an expensive, fast, desirable car which I drive extremely well. Anyway I am an offensive lout.
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57. Should my new tyres be on the front or the back ? aaaaaarrrrrrrrggggghhhhhh !
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Shoespy ... that reminds me.
58. Car washing routines. (Sigh!)
Edited by Round The Bend on 20/12/2007 at 09:18
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59. Best windscreen cleaning product.
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L\'escargot.
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61. I have an XYZ that is 6 years old. My warranty expired 3 years ago but now I have noticed the brakes are down to bare metal, the clutch is slipping and the exhaust blows. Can I reject the vehicle or at least have comeback on the manufacturer for recompense? Surely this car is not fit for purpose?
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62. Nissahondzuki valve clearances - I know something really fascinating about............
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63. ive got x thousands of pounds to waste on a luxury car and cant decide between a flash motor or b a different flash motor ..... waffle waffle blah blah waffle
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64. I think running around in a £500 clunker is called bangernomics and is morally superior to spending one's hard-earned on something one enjoys, like a new car.
Edited by nick on 20/12/2007 at 12:14
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66. (An earlier number was duplicated) My neighbour parks outside his property - should I kill him?
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reply to 66: No, that might lead to legal problems. Just stab his tyres in the middle of the night and bubble him to the old bill as a child molester and illegal immigrant.
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>57. Should my new tyres be on the front or the back ? aaaaaarrrrrrrrggggghhhhhh !
Well, if you lot could agree on an answer, people wouldn't keep asking! ;-)
I think this is my new favourite thread of all time.
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66 Warm water poured on an icy windscreen will shatter all the windows and refreeze on the ground making it hazardous for ants.
67 Washing up liquid in the washer bottle eats through the rubber glass surround causing the screen to pop out when you brake hard.
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65. Any tips on how to drive? My wife says I should do *this* but I've always thought it was best to do *that*
68. Middle lane hoggers (Clean forgot about them!)
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69. Do you leave car in gear when you park
70. Do you press button in when putting handbrake on or let it click up the ratchet.
71. Are you such a useless driver that you leave ABS switched on or are you as brilliant as me who can (in an emergency stop) have time to switch off ABS and threshold (or is it cadence?) brake to a safe stop?
72. Why do you buy front wheel drive when you could have rear wheel drive and hang the tail out on every corner on every trip
73 Why buy rear wheel drive cars when they are carp in snow
74 Why don't all these questions have question marks at the end
75 Why do 75% of posters spell independent as independant
76 Where are the answers to the 75 questions above?
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Phil
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Sorry! 68 was a repeat of 13.
Erm, "left lane hoggers" anyone?
"Cyclists"?
Oh well...
Put it down to eyesight problems - mostly caused by entries nos. 12, 42, 44, 51 (2nd one) and no. 46.
Yes, no.46: Floor mats! The synthetic Velcro came loose when I was double declutching during the roundabout undertaking manoeuvre so beloved of white van drivers and I slipped forward and poked my eye out on the accessory plug on my aftermarket SatNav recommended by Sitting Bull on last Thursday's thread...
What goes around comes around.
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77. TG is fantastic / rubbish
78. Can we have a proper TV program on motoring.
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79. why are cars more reliable than they were 82 years ago when i were a lad?
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80. why are cars less reliable than they were 82 years ago when i were a lad?
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Must get rid of the echo in the BR !
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Ah but PU, every time someone asks a question now we'll just be able to post a link to this thread - job done, and we can go out and see the world! :)
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oh no world.........
72.1 Tesco Car Parks....
off to Tesco now, been to see friends in Bangor and will be appearing in the local branch so if any BR's around there (Woddbines,Mrmender and Anglesey Ian) see a salt encrusted Roomster with an 8 foot aerial that's mine !
Edited by Pugugly {P} on 20/12/2007 at 22:29
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How spooked would you be PU if you came back to find a note under your wipers saying "Hello PU"??
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2007 Seat Altea XL 2.0 TDI (140) Stylance
2005 Skoda Fabia vrS
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He's also to be found in Holborn. Just off Kingsway, in an alley leading to Lincoln's Inn Fields, there is a sign bearing the legend 'PU's DINER'.
Maybe George Formby (nearly) has the reason for the 535d giving way to a Roomster:
Oh Mr PU,
What shall I do?
I'm feeling kind of Limehouse Chinese laundry blues......
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81a. front fog light offenders.
81b. rear fog light offenders.
82. people who leave brake lights on when stuck in traffic.
83. why have you moderated me?
84. where has my post been moved to?
85. Why has my post been deleted?
86. Why has the swearfilter obliterated an innocent word?
87. What does {p} mean by people's usernames?
88. The same old signatures at the end of a post that become boring after seeing them up to 50 times daily (ok, last one not so much a subject, but an observation)
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oh no world......... 72.1 Tesco Car Parks.... off to Tesco now been to see friends in Bangor and will be appearing in the local branch so if any BR's around there (Woddbines Mrmender and Anglesey Ian) see a salt encrusted Roomster with an 8 foot aerial that's mine !
I live about 1/2 mile away from Tesco Bangor PU can't sick a note under your wiper like has been sugested as i'm about 6000 miles away in Sudan!
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80. why are cars less reliable than they were 82 years ago when i were a lad? i think the altziemers is kicking in , scrapmetal....did you take your, i said did you take your tablets today?
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sorry for the exageration there,
hope im not getting altziemers at 27!!!!! only had my tablets for my hangover, too much festive beer!!!!
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89. IHAQ - how the hell do I connect my DVD Recorder/Sky/Video etc?
Edited by Round The Bend on 21/12/2007 at 09:06
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90 - IHAQ - Any number of central heating / plumbing related questions.
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Hang on a mo! at this rate we'll have nothing left to discuss!
actually is there anything that hasn't been discussed before, and if so what is it? - then we can discuss it a couple of times and add it to this thread! "Brilliant!!
Billy
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I live 3 miles from the M6 and need to get to somewhere 3 miles from the M1. What do Br's think is the best route?
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91. You put cooking oil in your TDCi? You complete idiot! You fool! You half-wit! But please do come back and tell us how you got on.
92. My car's been showing this funny red symbol on the dash that looks like an oil can for a while now, and now it won't turn over. What can I do?
93. How much? A whole LITRE of petrol into a common-rail diesel? Quick, sell it or you'll need new injectors and pump at £3000 a go plus it could blow up in your face. You might get £50 for it at the scrappers if you're lucky.
94. My heater's stopped working.
95. I posted on here a while ago but the thread has disappeared off the face of the earth (AKA page 1) so I'll start again...
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Mike Farrow
Edited by mfarrow {P} on 22/12/2007 at 12:24
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96. (Before 4th October, 2007) Can we have an edit button?
96a. (After 4th October, 2007) "Is this an edit button which I see before me,the handle toward my hand? Come, let me clutch thee ...."
Edited by tyro on 22/12/2007 at 13:26
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97 F1 is rubbish
98 F1 is great
99 I like VBH
and 100 I claim my prize
madf
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101 Why camchain engines are so much better than cambelt engines
Just ask a nissan micra/almera owner!
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102. Do I need to run my Aircon in winter.
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102a. Yes, all the time. Best leave the car on idle overnight just to be sure.
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103. White is the new silver. No it isn't. Yes it is.
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104 Pug missing his Beemer ;o)
105 My pet hate of door mirrors being referred to as wing mirrors.
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106 Deleted - off topic
Edited by Pugugly {P} on 24/12/2007 at 14:37
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107. BRoomers who can't keep to a numerical sequence.
sorted that out !
Edited by Pugugly {P} on 24/12/2007 at 14:37
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109. Winter tyres. What a waste of time for two consecutive days of snow.
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167. Which very large, over engineered, over specced car should I buy because I don't do small cars because they are unsafe (apparently because they can't hit 80 mph on merging on a motorway...)/dangerous/don't look good in the drive and the neighbours might think I've been demoted....
168. I can't exist without my car and then come up with a series of non-excuses eg I was on a bus in 1978 and it wasn't very nice...my wife can't be expected to use a train etc....we really need to live in the country and keep 3 horses but have a nice high urban income and commute 60 miles each way...
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101 Why camchain engines are so much better than cambelt engines Just ask a nissan micra/almera owner!
170. Why don't all you eurobox owners buy japanese like me (they're the best thing since sliced bread - more reliable, yada yada yada)?
171. How owning an Alfa Romeo is something we all must do at some time in our lives, otherwise we cannot be considered a real "lover of all things motoring" vis-a-vis "I wouldn't touch them with a bargepole (they're all not reliable, dodgy electrics, rubbish dealers, etc)";
172. Justifying why you bought a Vectra;
173. Whether Lewis Hamilton should have won this year's F1 championship;
174. The identity of The Stig;
175. Who are the worst drivers - lorry drivers or car drivers: neither - that award goes to White Van Man (not the forum user!)
176. I have 5p to spend and want a really good, reliable car. Any thoughts?
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>96a. (After 4th October, 2007) "Is this an edit button which I see before me,the handle toward my hand? Come, let me clutch thee ...<
And look at the trouble it got HIM into...
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169 (re 69a). Why does this super-duper forum technology almost never put my post in the right place?
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Pop-ups happen only in Towcester.
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