I see you have no answers as yet and so I'm replying because it's frustrating otherwise.
My experience of insurance companies is they are not charities - however, I don't think think they want to put you through the mill either. I've never had any insurance company ask for details like alloys etc but the engineers report might include this. I don't think this will invalidate your insurance although I can see that the insurance company won't pay for alloys but standard wheels.
I can say every accident is unique because of the circumstances, etc. If you show contrition and remorse for what has happened then I have found people get treated more leniently.
The Police are obliged to caution you. Sometimes charges are brought and dropped, sometimes it goes to court. If the magistrates see that you are sorry and willing to put right your mistake (we all make mistakes) then you will be treated well. Your own personal circumstances are taken very much into consideration - your car, injuries, hardship, getting to work, etc. You might say that as a result of this experience you will put yourself through the PassPlus scheme to improve your driving skills. If you get fined you can negotiate to pay this over a period of time. If this happens you will need to declare it on your next insurance application.
I think it's pretty certain your next lot of premiums are going to be high and maybe so high you can't afford to drive for a while.
When I got rear-ended I thought I was okay and pretty bad whiplash kicked in later that night. I still get pains now after nearly a year, especially when I'm tired. Even though it wasn't my fault, it's changed my driving habits in that I'm much more slower and bigger gaps between cars. Getting to work 5 minutes later is way better than not at all. But you now that and your driving will mature as a result.
Get a friend or taxi to get your stuff out of the boot.
Lastly, it's natural to be stressed - but being stressed won't do you any good or make the situation any better. You are going to be on a roller-coaster ride for a while so you might as well make it as comfortable as you can. Things will be out of your control but asking questions will help you see where you're going and what to expect.
Good luck and try and get some peace.
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