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Worst bike ever...unless you know better! - f2
What's the worst bike you have ever come across? By this I mean standard bikes rather than one that has been customised (either by design or accident) or just plain old neglected.

Cheekily, (fotunately), I haven't had the pleasure of riding the one that I'd like to nominate, the Norton Commander.

Imgine the scene; early 1990's, Regents Street, London, in the run up to Christmas. It's 4.30 in the afternoon, it's wet and it's just turning dark. Visor up, making my way through the traffic I come up behind a member of the London Ambulance Service on the Norton. I have the utmost respect for the riders of the emergency services so I thought I'd follow him through the traffic and see if I could pick up any tips (NB he was not on a shout so normal riding only).

It quickly became apparent that he was struggling somewhat to cope with the heavy traffic, there was clearly a large lag in the Norton's throttle response so that when the traffic moved forward large gaps would open in front of the bike, (inevitably filled by someone in a car changing lanes) at which point the Norton's rotary was finally making power and would hurtle forward into the now rapidly shrinking gap.

The rider was having to having to anticipate when the gaps would appear, open the throttle in advance, and then balance the whole lot on the brakes when it all started to go pear shaped. Chatting to the rider at the lights he was praying that the service would ditch the Nortons before they ran out of riders...

I'd be interested to hear other people's nominations.
f2
Worst bike ever...unless you know better! - Harleyman
Nottinghamshire plod had a few Commanders; they weren't well liked, fuel consumption was apparently pretty horrendous.

I've had a few turkeys in me time, but in fairness most of them were bad because they hadn't been looked after, either by me or previous owners. One that does stick out in my mind, though, was the Suzuki GSX250 (I think the model designation's correct) a 4-stroke twin which was literally "all rev and rattle" and I really didn't like it at all. Anything approaching a headwind dropped it down two gears; if anything it was a lot worse than the old Honda 250 G5 I'd had some years previously, which I was rather fond of but figures on many "worst ever" lists. Brakes were poor too.

No doubt someone will nominate MZ's, but I had a couple (125 and 150) as commuter hacks and whilst they were crude they were also reliable.
Worst bike ever...unless you know better! - madux
Hey! MZs were posh compared to CZs!
Worst bike ever...unless you know better! - 1400ted
Condor A350....bought it on the back of a road test and article in a popular classic bike magazine. The test report said it would cruise happily between 80 and 90 mph due to it's Ducati OHC Bevel drive motor. They obviously didn't road test it properly, just took the figures from the Ducati 350 specs. Was madly de-tuned for the Swiss Military and couldn't get it past 60. Nearside kickstart used to bite you. Good Grimeca brakes and Marzocchi forks but nothing else of note. Ran it on Swiss military plates for a couple of months. Got stolen, together with my bike trailer. Shame .....about the trailer !
Oh, and the dealers German Shepherd dog bit me when I went to collect the damn thing....just missed the 'family jewels'
Ted
Worst bike ever...unless you know better! - madux
I knew some Swiss bikers who fondly remembered the Condor (They never mentioned that it was a Ducati engine, though!)
Also the Moto-Saccoche (?) and one or two others that I have never heard of before or since.........
Worst bike ever...unless you know better! - 1400ted
Previous Condors were flat twins, like a Zundapp. At the Moto Coupe des Legendes in Dijon lst year there were dozens of makes completely unknown to me. There were some gorgeous little pre WW1 machines like a vintage office chair on wheels with the engine up behind the seat driving back wheel by a belt. Will have to look them up in 'Tragatch's book' .... love one !
Ted
Worst bike ever...unless you know better! - madux
Hmm, I was going to go to the Coupe des Legendes last year. I emailed the organisers re camping, cost and facilities (in French) but they did not reply. I did not go.
Worst bike ever...unless you know better! - 1400ted
We did i through Motorcycle Sport and Leisure Mag. Good hospitality package. Excellent organisation, about 20 of us Free to make your own way and speed. Overnighted in Dover, carp B&B but we booked that...turned out to be just a B, owners didn't get up early enough to do breakfast ! Stayed at the Ibis opp Dijon Station, used taxis to get to circuit. Long ride down via Dover, would go Hull next time. Motorway all the way in France but I ran out of petrol due to a 75 mile gap between pumps. Fortunately, Silverwing has enough space on board and I always carry one of those alloy camping bottles with a litre in. Was only 3 miles from next fuel. No police around though....fixed penalty on Autoroute.
Can't go this year, My riding mate and me both got 40th wedding annies !.....2010 look out!
Ted
Worst bike ever...unless you know better! - Glaikit Wee Scunner {P}
Within my memory- things like CZ125 and Jawa 350. They seized up and gear shift shafts bent and electrics failed and I shudder to remember..... I owned a Polish WSK, almost as bad.
Worst bike ever...unless you know better! - FotheringtonThomas
CJ250T.
Worst bike ever...unless you know better! - john farrar
A tie between a 250cc Norton Jubilee and 197cc Villiers engined Norman. the back of the gearbox fell off the Norton as I was pulling away...much to the amuzement of my mates. The Norman was so badly built that I had to "seize" up the fork legs solid to stop it throwing me off!(it was a bit tired)
Most fun was a tuned Suzuki RG500 closley followed by my ex- vintage racing Scott Squirrel with nitrous oxide injection(not a word of a lie).
Worst bike ever...unless you know better! - craig-pd130

I'd like to have heard that Scott :-D they sound glorious on an open pipe, with the Burgess silencers they just sound flat.
Worst bike ever...unless you know better! - Harleyman
CJ250T.


As far as Honda 250's go, I'd agree with you. I was actually rather fond of its predecessor, the G5; owned one for a year or so and despite the fact that it was glacially slow I found it comfortable and reliable, plus it was a fairly big bike for a 250 and you could pile a weekend's camping gear on it and still be fairly comfortable two-up. It was quite a handsome bike too.

The CJ lacked the leccy start and the sixth gear, and the styling was if anything worse than the Super Dream with a yucky yellow or orange as the main colours. Horrible 2-1 exhaust as well.
Worst bike ever...unless you know better! - craig-pd130

Two friends had truly rotten bikes. One had a Neval Minsk, the Russian 125cc 2-stroke single. Where to start? The fact you never knew if it was running backwards or forwards until you engaged the clutch? The complete lack of brakes? The tyres which seemed to be made of old condom material?

He got rid and bought a Kwak 250 Scorpion, which was nice until it seized the cam due to the notorious gunged-up oil strainer problem. Great design, Kawasaki, putting the oil strainer BEHIND the oil pump so you have to remove the pump to get at it :-/

The other had a Yam XS250, which was totally gutless, heavy and slow. My GT200X5 was far quicker in all circumstances. The XS also had the starting foible common to the small Yam 4-strokes. It wouldn't start when warm. Starting from stone cold: fine. Hot starting within 5 minutes after switching off: fine.

But if left for more than 5 minutes, no amount of running&bumping, kicking etc would get it going unless you put some fuel down the plugholes. Eventually he saw the light and got a Suzi X7.
Worst bike ever...unless you know better! - doctorchris
I feel terrible.
I've owned a CZ, which was an awful bike, and a Honda CJ250T in yellow which I thought was great but appeared to have no pulling power whatsoever!
After that,a couple of BMs.
If ever I buy another bike, I need advice from the HJ bike style council!
Worst bike ever...unless you know better! - madux
I seem to remember pulling quite a few birds on my 350K4 though :)
Worst bike ever...unless you know better! - Harleyman
I seem to remember pulling quite a few birds on my 350K4 though :)


They were by far the nicest of the Honda 250/350 twins, with the exception of the CB72 which was a real flyer; good engine, decent styling and best of all that lovely 2LS front brake.

Having said that, the short-lived 250 Dream (between the CJ and the ubiquitous Super Dream) was a favourite of mine; underpowered yes, but a very comfortable bike to ride. The 400 version was excellent.

Edited by Harleyman on 05/03/2009 at 22:31

Worst bike ever...unless you know better! - craig-pd130

My dad had a CB77 until I was 8 ... many fond memories of that :)
Worst bike ever...unless you know better! - Derfel
I had a CB250 K1, the one with the flat sided tank in white and gold which was a good bike at the time. IIRC the early ones revved 1000 rpm higher than the later ones and were a bit quicker. There is a bit of info on these bikes on the link below. 30 BHP from a 4 stroke 250 is not bad for a bike produced in 1970.

www.usedbikeguide.com/bible/display.asp?id=489
Worst bike ever...unless you know better! - jag
if i remember correctly my bsa barracuda 250 single had 28hp in 1968, if i'm wrong somebody will correct me. it melted the piston at 6000mls, a common fault as they ran too weak and i thrashed the nuts off it. used to do the 24mls to work in 22mins including observing the 30mph limit in 2 small towns. those were the days. jag.
Worst bike ever...unless you know better! - Robin Reliant
A mate bought a Suzuki RE5 when they first came out. That would be high on anyone's list of all time turkeys.
Worst bike ever...unless you know better! - Derfel
How about a Royal Enfield Bullet powered by a diesel engine!

"navigation up the gearbox is a bit of a bind when it takes all five gears to move the plot up to 30mph!"

www.realclassic.co.uk/diesel05112800.html
Worst bike ever...unless you know better! - JohnM{P}
Mid 70's, I bought a AJS Stormer Trail - the scrambler, slightly detuned and made road legal with a 'silencer' and token lights. It still wakened the dead, and although it started easily, you had to keep on blipping the throttle until it warmed up. As I discovered early one Sunday morning, switching on the lights (no battery, run off the coil) would stall the engine if it wasn't thoroughly warmed up. After 3 cycles of kick, yeeanng-ang-ang-ang, baaarp yeang-ang-ang-ang, lights, bother, stalled again, I drove off in the dark, having woken the entire street.
The clutch was obviously never meant to be used - fearfully heavy, it kept pulling the nipples off of the cable, so I became quite adept at clutchless gearchanges.
I finally made the mistake of trying to ride it from east London to Bath one wet Sunday night; an earth lead fell off, stopping it, then whilst cruising at a noisy but relatively slow pace, it siezed, depositing me in the middle lane, the bike coming to rest in the outside lane. Luckily the motorway was quieter in those days...
Amazingly, it wasn't damaged and I eventually managed to sell it - it did look splendid with its alloy tank, but it was a motorcross bike, utterly useless for the road...
Worst bike ever...unless you know better! - Daedalus
I had a Honda CBX the 6 pot one brand new when they first came out in 1980 ish . It was total tosh.(My second worst was a BSA C15) I used to think it handled like a barge; then we went on a barge holiday last year and I realised I was doing the barges a dis-service. Coils went on it and then took months to arrive, I ended up with a CB500 coil modifed to fit to keep it going. The worst was the engine knocking, that was new big ends, mains, cams chains, I could keep going on and on. Promised I would never have another Honda ever again. Then I bought a Blackbird, the reports on them where so good, it had 1400 miles on it was 6 months old and cost me £5,500 THE BEST BIKE I ever owned 50,000 miles in 5 years put new tyres on every now and then, serviced it, one new chain and still got £3,500 when I sold it, fantastic.

Daedalus.

Edited by Webmaster on 29/03/2009 at 04:34

Worst bike ever...unless you know better! - DP
Ah, the Blackbird. Powered seemingly by a giant electric motor that makes no noise whatsoever, and propels you to 120 mph with so little fuss and effort, that you think most people are just driving really slowly until the blue lights appear in the mirror. ;-)
I have never ridden (or driven) anything that disguises speed so effectively, or goes so ridiculously quickly for so little effort.
Worst bike ever...unless you know better! - Rich53
Jawa Model 634 (350cc twin). Bought new in 1973, as I thought in my innocence it was all I could afford. I would have been better spending the same money on a second-hand Jap bike. I can't begin to describe how awful it was. The agricultural nature, slowness and lack of sophistication I could stand, but the poor fuel economy (I got about 30 mpg, similar to a Kawasaki 750 triple) and desperate unreliability make it heartbreaking to own. One good thing came out of it: I lost my fear of dismantling stuff, and I could strip the engine and replace seals and rings in the dark with one hand. Truly nasty motorbike, and almost put me off for life. Luckily, my next bike was a second-hand GT250A, which was a barrel of laughs.
Worst bike ever...unless you know better! - craig-pd130

The GT250A's were very quick indeed, very underrated 'cos they didn't quite have the looks of the Yam RDs
Worst bike ever...unless you know better! - Robin Reliant
The Ural Cossack which was imported from Russia during the early to mid seventies must give any other shed a run for it's money. Based on a 1938 BMW boxer twin only without the performance (sic) or reliability many apparantly arrived damaged after sitting round in crates for three years before shipping.

I remember the adverts stating "A superbike it isn't..."

They weren't wrong as their nearest companion would have been a tractor with one side sawn off.

Edited by Robin Reliant on 18/04/2009 at 14:03

Worst bike ever...unless you know better! - borasport20
I'm not a biker, but in thev early 80's I worked with a chap who had (a) a tin leg (b) a drink problem (c) a Cossack Ural with a sidecar - the gearchange was on the right side for his working leg, and the sidecar helped keep it upright. He gave me a lift to Abergavenny one night when he was singing with a jazz band, and being on the vulnerable side of the road when he'd alread had half a bottle of gin was 'interesting'

I can't remember getting back, so by then I must had had more Milk of Amnesia than he did, but I'm still here to tell the tale
Worst bike ever...unless you know better! - BrianW
I had a Honda CB200 Benly with a fairing which went very well, other than the 6v electrics which provided the headlight with about two candlepower.
I used to poodle onto the A12 and wait until something overtook me at the speed I wanted to go then just tucked in behind and followed the tail lights for the next 12 miles.

Decided to upgrade to a Honda 250 Super Dream, thinking bigger engine, more power etc.. Bad move!

Had the fairing swapped over but soon found that the performance fell well below that of the Benly. Just no guts at all.
Even swapped the twin exhausts for a combined one on the advice of the garage that sold it to me, but it made no difference whatsoever.

Went onto a Honda CD250U and found them ideal for my purposes. Am now on my third, having worn out the other two, one at 100,000 miles.
Worst bike ever...unless you know better! - jetta
Way back in the mid 60's Honda offered a 150cc twin that was a dog. Standard joke was when you tried to go more than 50 mph, adding thrtottle just made more exhaust noise and it was true !! Opposite end of that was my Kawasaki Mach III. A three cyl. 2-stroke, It was 500cc of brute power and awsome acceleration. Brakes and cornering could have been better but it was great fun to ride.
Worst bike ever...unless you know better! - madux
The (154cc) Honda C95 was my first bike. I know everything seems fast when you are 17
but it certainly did more than 50.
Remember that in those days you had to compare it to a BSA Bantam or Francis Barnett - the Honda had an electric start and, erm, what else? Actually my lecky start rarely worked because the alternator was fluffy-diced and I had to charge the battery every night.
It sounded nice on megaphones though.

Edited by madux on 07/05/2009 at 01:21

Worst bike ever...unless you know better! - jetta
Neglected to mention the owner/rider was rather hefty. He rather matched the wide square front wheel mudguard in profile. After a few minutes at full throttle he could approach 60. (Just a few years later Honda introduced their 160cc which was a complete turnaround compared to the old "lectric start" 150)
Worst bike ever...unless you know better! - doug_r1
My brother and a mate both had 350 Aermacchi singles, with AMF Harley Davidson written on the tank, what a pile of rubbish, snuff-box switches that crackled and sparked in the rain, and endless starting problems with stripped starter teeth. The CZ 175 he had later on was a paragon of reliability in comparison.
Worst bike ever...unless you know better! - Harleyman
Fun when they were going, though. To be fair, the electrics were no worse or better than most Italian stuff of the period (including far more prestigious marques like Ducati and MV) and the starter crank was an acknowledged fault which was improved on later models; it didn't help that they had left-hand kickstarts which require a totally different technique.

Might surprise you to know that they're very sought-after these days, particularly on the vintage racing scene.
Worst bike ever...unless you know better! - Andy_Daytona 900
the Dax.. nuff said (if you can call it a motorbike).