For reasons best not discussed a few colleagues and I had a long continental journey by road recently. To pass the time we invented a new game. It got me wondering what other games people play with and without the family in tow.
In the absence of pub signs we had to invent our own version of cricket. Here are the rules.
Totty Cricket (1)
Driver banned from taking part before anyone starts getting on high horse.
Runs scored whenever you overtake or are overtaken by vehicle containing personable totty. Boundaries only scored by high rated examples.
Sixes can definitely only be scored by AAA rating (2). Example of AAA rating receptionist Hotel B***l in Dunkirk.
Wickets lost when examples seen rated lower than F (2). To give a guide F rating involves phrases containing words like pole and barge.
Note an excellent innings in Belgium @ 35 for 3 was brought short by an overtaken coach containing...... well lets say retired hurt to the pavilion.
(1) © 2002 FiF et al, several pat pending
(2) According to the Billy Bob - Bubba methodology © 2001 US Pat pending
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Sad.
very sad.
very very sad!
almost as bad as pub cricket ( I was miles ahed, whe we passed the cricketers - 44+ 2 umpires!)
earlier this year we discussed a phenomena called the "rear end shunt" - somebody too busy checking out the tottie (esp the rear end), and rear ends somebody....sad, sexist and sad.
(also, a lot of fun!)
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Was in a party of 4 that visited the 1984 Le Mans. Drivers job was to choose a well-known phrase eg "absence makes the heart grow fonder" and the passengers, in rotation, would invent part of a story that would hopefully end with that punchline. Change of story teller to be signalled by the driver. Points scored arbitrarily.
? well, you had to be there ...
Nowadays we do I spy or spot Eddie Stobarts; it's not the same.
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Do you not have Eddie versus Norbert competitions, one team takes Stobarts the other Dentressangles ?
I don't do this you understand, I read about it in a newspaper column penned by the great Ipswich Town & England centre half Kevin Beattie.
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Excuse my (Johnny Foreigner) ignorance- what is an eddie stobart? and what is a dentressangle?
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Matt
Known as 'Nobby and Stobby' I believe.
Never played it - honest!
Regards
John
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Ian (CT)
Norbert Dentressangle are another haulage company - their trailers are red with white text, and are everywhere. I'm afraid I couldn't tell you if the drivers have nice overalls.
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We used to play car reg acronyms.
N123BJD = 'Big Job Daily'
J123KSF = 'Kiss Sarah's *****'.
etc, etc.
In Germany we used to see who could blow a raspberry quickest upon seeing the 'Ausfahrt' signs.
Once, in the back of a van, a mate and I made a sign which we held up at the window that said 'smile if you had it last night' and watched the reaction of following motorists. A real sociology lesson.
My wife used to compete with her sister (when they were 38 and 37) counting animals. The score went to zero if the other one saw a church, as they 'buried' the other's animals.
I say 'we used to' above, because I am much more sensible now. (Pass me another dried frog pill, please).
Martin.
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Some years ago we taught my young daughter (aged about 3) how to count during a long trip by car across Canada by getting her to spot all the people wearing their baseball caps round the wrong way. After a week she was proficient up to 100 (well Canada's an awfully empty place.......)
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Eddie Stobart is a nationwide UK haulage company (which for tax reasons may be running on Dutch or Belgian plates). I believe that Norberts are another, but not so well known.
Stobarts led the haulage industry in raising standards, all their trucks have a female name on the front and their drivers are smartly turned out in overalls.
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But what about Willi Betz??? I have no idea where he is based but in one memorable weekend I saw his trucks in Moscow, on the motorway near where I was living in Istanbul and then on the M1 in England. A huge operation.
I used to have to drive from Charles dr Gaulle Airport in Paris to our factory in the champagne region of France (sadly not a champagne factory). In order to pass the time I used to count the Norberts, Willis and Eddies. In that part of the world Norbert would always come out far ahead, folowed by Willi.
The ulitmate brain numbing game I have heard of is I spy of number plates in numerical order. That is, spot a 1, then spot a 2 etc etc. Sad to say i have been stuck on 29 for ages now.
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Re number plate spotting - I told a mate about it en route to Leeds from Berkshire and he got up to 21 by the time we reached Leeds.
Took me just over a year to get to 100. Although I was sick of it, I found myself still at it - it became a subconscious compulsion. I'm over it now though...
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youve heard Habcess make fart go honda joke?
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