Motoring Forums!!

Honest John Back Room » Motoring discussion
What is life like with your car? Let us know and win £500 in John Lewis vouchers | No thanks
View Threaded
Tue 31 Jan 2006 22:44
Motoring Forums!! - R75
Bentley Forums - - - I used the ashtray today. How do I replace it?
BMW 3 Series forums - - -Winston, why do I keep getting pulled over, it ain't stolen yo.
BMW 7-series forum - - - Where to get a service on my Rolex?
VW Bug forum - - - The Save the Earth concert was a success (pics)
Yugo Forum - - - When's the last time yours ran?
Lamborghini forum - - - Wind noise around 210MPH
MX5 forums - - - Someone in Toyota Hilux just ran over my car (pics)
Hilux forum - - -MX5 stuck in my undercarriage. How do I safely remove it? (pics)
Rover 800 forum - - - Problems parallel parking at bingo.
Range Rover Forum - - - Is the price of petrol going down anytime soon?
Delorean forum - - - Just got back from the future and blew a head gasket. Please help. I'm from 1985.
Honda Accord forum - - - Mum is giving me the car. Looking for some cheap, used 18 inch rims.
Toyota Yaris forum - - - Do our cars use AAA or AA's?
Ferrari forums - - - Need suggestions about a business trip to Colombia. Want to get in and out fast.
Porsche forums - - - Tyre just went flat. Is it best to trade or sell the car myself?
Mini forum - - - Just flipped the Cooper after seeing The Italian Job. Suing the movie company. (pics)
Dax Cobra forum - - - I frightened myself on the way home from work yesterday. How to get wee stains out of the leather?
McLaren F1 forum - - -Some punk kid in a F16 tried to race me.
Hummer forum - - - Had a fender bender today. 24 hurt, 10 killed. Do I have to get the black touch-up paint from the dealer? He's 25 miles away. That's £35 in petrol.
Fiat forum - - -Hello? Am I the only member?
Subaru WRX forum - - - I'm thinking Blue and gold, how about you ??
Chevy pickup forum - - - How do I git the dried tobacco juice stains off the side of mah truck?
Supra Forums - - -Head too big to fit in car, should have bought a Targa.
Volvo forum. - - - What biker, I never saw a biker, he just came from nowhere, I didn't mean to hit him.
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Tue 31 Jan 2006 22:49
Motoring Forums!! - PhilW
Citroen Forum--- my car has no electrical/suspension problems, why am I the odd one out?
--
Phil
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Wed 1 Feb 2006 01:21
Motoring Forums!! - Citroënian {P}
Skoda forum - Why are people spending money on Cupras? My VRs is every bit as good, cheaper...
Seat forum - Why are people spending money on R32s? My Cupra is every bit as good, cheaper...
VW forum - Why are people spending money on S3s? My R32 is every bit as good, cheaper...
Audi forum - Why are people spending money on Bentleys? My bi-engine TT is every bit as good, cheaper...
Bentley forum - Why are people spending money on Gallardos? My Continential GT is every bit as good, cheaper...


--Lee .. Welcome to Anytown USA
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Wed 1 Feb 2006 17:20
Motoring Forums!! - Roberson
Ford forum: How much of yours has dissolved in the rain?
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Tue 21 Aug 2012 22:43
Motoring Forums!! - Buster Cambelt
Skoda forum - Why are people spending money on Cupras? My VRs is every bit as good, cheaper...

More like....

Why buy a Golf when my Skoda is wonderful? If you don't like your Skoda then my Skoda is wonderful. If your Skoda is unreliable then you are wrong because my Skoda is wonderful. You should be pleased that your Skoda is unreliable because Skoda dealers are such nice people and my Skoda is wonderful. What do you mean you sold your Skoda? My Skoda is wonderful.

Why buy an Audi because my Skoda is wonderful.

Etc....

On second thoughts there is already a forum just like that.

Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Tue 31 Jan 2006 23:25
Motoring Forums!! - BobbyG
LOL. Brilliant :)
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Tue 31 Jan 2006 23:50
Motoring Forums!! - Avant
Fiat forum - most people seem to be againstem.

New Honda Civic forum - Honest officer, I couldn't see the 40-tonner behind me.
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Wed 1 Feb 2006 04:43
Motoring Forums!! - mrmender
MGB Forums--- Beard trimmers on special offer in Argos
2CV Forum---- How many trees you hugged today
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Wed 1 Feb 2006 08:08
Motoring Forums!! - teabelly
2CV forum - I drove over a plouged field and the eggs broke - is there something wrong with my suspension?


teabelly
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Wed 1 Feb 2006 08:36
Motoring Forums!! - NowWheels
BMW forum: why doesn't everyone else on the motorway just get out of my way?
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Wed 1 Feb 2006 08:42
Motoring Forums!! - mss1tw
Saxo forum: I got phat spinnaz on my ride, it's sick innit.
Fiesta forum: Yeah, must've had at least 8 people this week think it's a Viper.
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Wed 1 Feb 2006 09:25
Motoring Forums!! - Sofa Spud
Land Rover forum: I've had my new Defender for two weeks and nothing's fallen off it yet.
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Wed 1 Feb 2006 10:36
Motoring Forums!! - 3T
New shape Mini forum --- why do people keep asking me how much their house is worth?
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Wed 1 Feb 2006 11:51
Motoring Forums!! - Wally Zebon
X5 Forum - What's the shortest route from school to Waitrose?
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Wed 1 Feb 2006 12:43
Motoring Forums!! - Vansboy
Audi TT Forum - Yes I ALWAYS buy German made cars - for their build quality, of course.

VB
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Wed 1 Feb 2006 12:46
Motoring Forums!! - Robin Reliant
The Rover Forum: If everyone in the country could be persuaded to put £10 into a fund we could save...
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Wed 1 Feb 2006 13:16
Motoring Forums!! - BazzaBear {P}
X5 Forum - What's the shortest route from school to
Waitrose...

You missed the second part of the sentence:

...without getting my tyres dirty?
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Wed 1 Feb 2006 13:28
Motoring Forums!! - bradgate
BMW 318 forum - Why does everyone assume I'm a rep? Don't the know I'm actually a senior executive?
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Wed 1 Feb 2006 13:29
Motoring Forums!! - mss1tw
Honda Jazz forum - What's a forum, Albert?
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Wed 1 Feb 2006 13:34
Motoring Forums!! - bradgate
Suzuki Vitara forum - Hiya Duckies!!! Who has the best bum, Mark Oaten or Simon Hughes?
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Wed 1 Feb 2006 13:44
Motoring Forums!! - Happy Blue!
Mondeo TDCi forum - Hi, I'm new here. I'm looking at the BMW 320d ES, but the Mondeo offers so much more. Am I right?
--
Espada III - well if you have a family and need a Lamborghini, what else do you drive?
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Wed 1 Feb 2006 13:50
Motoring Forums!! - mss1tw
XR3i forum - Are you startin'?
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Wed 1 Feb 2006 16:12
Motoring Forums!! - Lud
New shape Renault Megane forum: Does my bum look big in this?
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Wed 1 Feb 2006 16:37
Motoring Forums!! - Aretas
Eddie Jordan Forum. Contribute for only 10p per word.
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Wed 1 Feb 2006 17:20
Motoring Forums!! - bell boy
moggi 1000 forum...... to save the world
beetle forum.......peace man
rover forum.....its never done this before
mgtf forum......does my hair look nice in this
hyundai coupe forum........YES IT DOES LOOK LIKE A PORSCHE
ford focus forum......i"d rather be fishing
fiat punto mk2 forum......i love my car
proton persona forum........taxi
toyota forum.....zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz






--
\"a little man in a big world/\"
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Wed 1 Feb 2006 17:36
Motoring Forums!! - Lud
Hummer forum: Don't look at me! I'm shy!
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Wed 1 Feb 2006 17:38
Motoring Forums!! - Cardew
Scania Forum - Tailgating by a Professional Driver
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Wed 1 Feb 2006 17:52
Motoring Forums!! - Lud
Smart forum: My other 'car' is a Mercedes A series.
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Wed 1 Feb 2006 18:18
Motoring Forums!! - mrmender
Smart forum: My other 'car' is a Mercedes A series.

Naa Lud should be
Smart forum--- It's made be Mercedes you know
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Wed 1 Feb 2006 18:22
Motoring Forums!! - Vansboy
Smart Forum - The dealer was really generous - it was only the started that failed, but the fitted me a whole new engine!!

Mx5 Forum - Does anyone know how to put the hood up (well that's what Mr's V would write, even in this weather!!)

VB
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Wed 1 Feb 2006 18:32
Motoring Forums!! - barchettaman
Police drivers forum: Anyone got any experience of the new Vectra before I take it for a spin on the M54?
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Wed 1 Feb 2006 18:38
Motoring Forums!! - Pugugly {P}
BMW forum: why doesn't everyone else on the motorway just get out of my way?

At least the stereotype is generic rather than specific to the 5 series.
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Wed 1 Feb 2006 18:53
Motoring Forums!! - mss1tw
Smart forum - The best oxymoron since 'The War on Terror'
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Wed 1 Feb 2006 19:01
Motoring Forums!! - Lud
Urban BMW 3 series drivers' forum, commonly asked questions, no. 1: Is this your car, sir?
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Wed 1 Feb 2006 19:14
Motoring Forums!! - mss1tw
Urban BMW 3 series drivers' forum, commonly asked questions, no. 1:
Is this your car, sir?


:^D Heh heh heh..
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Wed 1 Feb 2006 21:27
Motoring Forums!! - local yokel
BMW 1 series forum: It can't be ugly, it's a BMW
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Wed 1 Feb 2006 22:49
Motoring Forums!! - OAP

Honda Jazz Forum: Do I *have* to wear a hat when driving my Jazz?
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Wed 1 Feb 2006 23:17
Motoring Forums!! - PhilW
White van forum - why is it not possible to fit any kind of hands free phone kit to my van yet I am required to be on the phone at all times?
PS I have the same problem on my BMW 7 series.
--
Phil
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Thu 2 Feb 2006 00:52
Motoring Forums!! - Lud
Ferrari F55 forum: 'Boots won't fit in boot,' United star claims.
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Thu 2 Feb 2006 09:51
Motoring Forums!! - tyro
S-class forum: "Economy a little flat. Any tips for boosting GDP?"
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Thu 2 Feb 2006 09:54
Motoring Forums!! - Nsar
HJ Forum - I have a sudden and strong urge to play bingo with Kerry Katona, does anyone know if this is possible?
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Thu 2 Feb 2006 09:55
Motoring Forums!! - mss1tw
Honda Jazz Forum: Do I *have* to wear a hat when
driving my Jazz?


Ask the other HJ...Our survey says yes. And aviator glasses.

:^D
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Thu 2 Feb 2006 22:42
Motoring Forums!! - OAP

Are you telling us that HJ wears his hat when driving or that he too drives a Honda Jazz...or both? Either way, I am delighted to be in such good company:o)
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Thu 2 Feb 2006 23:15
Motoring Forums!! - NowWheels
Almera forum: Quick! someone get an ambulance for Adam ( tinyurl.com/bolno )
Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Sun 19 Aug 2012 09:22
Motoring Forums!! - oldroverboy

Adam. The car? GM/OPEL have that many problems you say?

Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Sun 19 Aug 2012 10:19
Motoring Forums!! - Engineer Andy

1. Any old Japanese small-mid size car from the 1980s-90s (in immaculate condition) forum:

DOES ANYONE KNOW WHERE TO PURCHASE ARE PAIR OF DECENT DRIVING GLOVES FOR A REASONABLE PRICE THESEDAYS?

or

DO YOU GET A DISCOUNT FOR DRVING 1000 MILES PER ANNUM RATHER THAN 2000 MILES?

(the capitalisation is part of the effect - my dad used to send me "emails" from work back in the early 90s when I was at university with all caps wording!)

2. BMW X5 forum:

Hey guys - I took mine off road today for the car boot sale - got stuck trying to do a racing start on the kiddies football pitch!

or

Wanted: rare X5 with standard rims, no blacked-out windows, personalised plate or gun/drugs pockets. All colours ok except black.

Reply | Report as offensive | Link
Wed 22 Aug 2012 10:52
Motoring Forums!! - RicardoB

After the other little dingdongs on here re forums, I found myself having a nice chuckle at these.

Unfortunately I can't think of any funny new ones to add, yet. If at all.

Reply | Report as offensive | Link