Mrs H asked me to investigate a strange noise from the front of her C3 at the weekend. It was the NSF mudflap that had parted company with the wheelarch fixings, but not the sill bolt, and was dragging on the ground and was beyond repair. The body of the mudflap was full of weighty grit, a probable contribution to it falling off.
These flaps or mouldings, if you prefer, have a drain hole supposedly to let water and debris out, but I don't think the hole is big enough. All the other mudflaps were full of grit and mud so the message is to keep them clean with a blast from the garden hose. You C3 owners do all wash your own cars, don't you?
Apparently Citroen UK are working on delivering a software fix through the National Grid via a standard mains battery charger to all those C3 owners whose mud flap drain holes aren't big enough. Until the fix is on general release, we'll just have to clean them manually;-)
Hawkeye
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Stranger in a strange land
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"Apparently Citroen UK are working on delivering a software fix through the National Grid via a standard mains battery charger to all those C3 owners whose mud flap drain holes aren't big enough. Until the fix is on general release, we'll just have to clean them manually;-)
Hawkeye"
Dont want to sound patronizing or anything, as i dont know if you are having a laugh or not, and as i dont own a C3
But when you say "National Grid" I assume you mean the 240V Mains power supply?
a software update is computer data, this cant be transmited along a mains power supply, this will be done by connecting the ECU/The Cars computer into the Dealers/Garages computer and downloading a software update or a Firmware update.
Also how would a "Software Update" correct drain holes in the car???????????
Ste
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1983 (A) Vauxhall Astra 1.3L
1993 (K) Vauxhall Cavalier 2.0i GLS
1999 (T) Renault Laguna 1.6
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In common with most late model Citroens, on a specific command from the BSI via each lateral multiplex bus, the (synthetic) rubber of the mudflaps modify their 'flex' characteristics at molecular level so as to achieve a 10% improvement in drag and consequent economy. By altering the software data this 'flex' can be increased, thus elongating the drain holes and thus improving the removal of any trapped debris.
The distribution of software updates via the national grid has been made possible since the introduction of PME earthing systems in domestic dwellings in the UK - effectively giving the neutral conductor dual role status and capable of supporting high speed data transfer at negligible cost.
Sorry if that sounds a bit technical but it's a system which is, I believe, unique to Citroen and is a closely guarded trade secret (awaiting patent)The secrecy shrouding the technique actually accounts for the fact that you will not find a Haynes manual for the C5 on the shelves. It would simply turn the whole automotive industry on its head. I understand the C3 manual has also been heavily abridged for the same reason.
Graeme
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I must say that the last message on this thread has made me smile. I am currently battling with Citroen regarding a number of engine 'flat spots' in a Xsara HDi and every explanation and fix used so far is down to software........and it's still not fixed!!
It's at times like this I really miss my mechanically simple 306 D turbo!!
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Thanks C5 owner that was most enlightening. However Citroen are slightly behind the times in this respect. Renault have used the same synthetic rubbers and plastics but have imbedded a small radio transponder in each item. All Renault dealerships have been equipped with radio transmitters so they can interact with each part of the car.
As each Renault passes within range of a dealership they can identify the car and its components. If its know to live in that area the dealership will then transmit small changes to the plastics, changing the shape and size and thereby inducing rattles and squeaks. Of course if business is really slow they will transmit to the cars main ECU where they can cause any kind of engine anomaly to occur, and with the resultant access to the can bus they can interact with any electrical item.
With sufficient SAN attached storage in the garage the car can be repaired as it approaches the dealership so the fault disappears, and they can charge you three hours labour without having to touch the car.
The whole system is networked between dealers so any dealer can request a "Remote Off Territory Total Engineering Recall" (ROTTER)
BMW are introducing the same system but as they have no understanding of how their electronic systems work (It all runs on Microsoft CE Automotive) it has been outsourced to Microsoft Authorised Resellers, and all branches of PC World.
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I believe that you can now get an upgrade to fit this system to the early model T Ford.
It's called the
B udget
A ftermarket
L ive
L iason
S ystem.
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Ah the old Microsoft CE ploy and outsourced to branches of PC World to boot! We're doomed! We're doomed!
I'm expecting to see service bills very soon sounding something like this....
Reformatting brake discs £150
Re-installing laminated Windows £200
Reloading driver's drivers £50
Overhauling USB/OS/NS hubs £100
Reconciling car port conflict
(making good damage to front wing) £500
:-)
Graeme
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