Has a new law been passed whereby if you are a man aged under 25 you must wear a baseball cap whilst driving and drive like a complete a***hole (usually in a Vauxhall Nova or Corsa with ridiculously oversive alloys and rear spoiler).
I know when we were young and first got on the road we all liked to drive as fast as possible but soon learned to calm down if we wanted to stay in one piece, but it seems that driving standards of the young seem to be getting worse not better!
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Personally I still like to drive as fast as possible: I'm just more discreet about it!
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So, Alex, does your 'discretion' mean that you don't drive like an anal orifice, or that you no longer wear a baseball cap over your tam?
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I think you're being a little unfair.
It's common knowledge that wearing a baseball hat makes your car go faster, improves your driving skill and makes you a hit with the fairer sex, or whichever takes your fancy.
Credit should be given to these young heroes who manage to keep the awesome performance of these cars under control, I seldom see one in town doing less than 50.
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I agree, I marvel how they can screech to a stop exactly 1 metre from the front of a bus/lorry/another car.
I am also amazed how they cannot afford a decent car, but can spend the price of a Focus tarting it up, this obveusly makes their b reg escort XR2 better than any other car on the road.
I am also jealous of their ability to see perfectly at night with just sidelights and fog lights on, and their pre-knowledge of when it will become foggy, and switch on the afore mentioned fog lights.
I agree with Lee on this, far from frowning at this showmanship, we should knight these brave, fearless superheros who have abilities we can only dream of. Arise sir Daz/Kev/Garry
Kev
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And now Halfords have thrown in their lot wth Ripspeed these guys even have a legit place to shop.
David
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O dear, does that mean it will become atrendy shop, removing all sensible things such as Haynes manuals and things to be replaced with Airforce grade wings, wheels measured in foot not inches, and those stupid stupid exhausts?
O dear.
Can anyone explain the point of those 'Rally car/F1 car' style fuel covers are for? Or are they there to help them find it?
Am I missing something from my yoof?
Kev
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does this new law also say that these tarted up escorts have to be violent colours, like lime green, bright yellow, and a sort of dayglow pink.
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The bright colours are to warn motorcyclists to look out for them - a bit like bees and wasps, see? Most of these guys don't seem to know what a bike is, or pedestrians come to that. Mind you, I could say the same for many other drivers, too.
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I believe that these young drivers can get a discount on their insurance if they pass a 6 month course of evening classes twice a week on how to wear a baseball cap ther right way round.
We have them here in droves as well (for Nova/Escort substitute Lancer/Civic) with suspension lowered to the point where they have to crab-wise over every speed hump, thus holding up all the traffic for km behind. Worse with 50,000 watts of mindless techno belting out through the darkened windows.
I believe this condition is known as "SMS" - Small Dick Syndrome. Occasionally the subject grows out of it. Those who don't develop an unhealthy interest in grown men beating each other up as they try to get a leather ball between a pair of sticks for ridiculous money.
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Thanks Growler ---- I thought they screwed their heads round to get the peak at the back. Didn't know they get an NVQ to get it in that position.
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It's a well known fact? that drivers wearing a cap of any variety are to given an xtra wide berth..worst of the species is the cloth cap wearer, it would appear to be an accessory to match the owners ears and eyes.
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Even Haynes are getting on the Bandwagon and launching manuals on tarting up a 1.0L Saxo/Corsa/Nova/AX/Fiesta.
........& we all know that only VW Golfs are worthy of any applause.
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Erm, I do believe it was your Golf GTI which started all of this. It had to come across and be faster, better looking, better handling, and better screwed together didn't it?
Before this, the youth of that day were happy with 50pmh out of a car, and that took most of the day to achieve so they went home and dreamed of breaking speed limits instead.
Thank the Germans, yet again, better than us at everything, it appears.
HH
Kev
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It is a well known fact that the wearing of a baseball cap unless you are actualy playing basenall at the time lowers the IQ of the wearer by 25 points
wearing the baseball cap backwards lowers it by 50 points...
~R
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My 19 year old son regretably fits into this category. He managed to wear out a set of Pirelli P2000s in 4000miles together with a set of pads and warped discs. He even managed to snap both handbrake cables. .Pleas to take it easy allied to forecasts of penalties ahead fall on deaf ears and are not helped by his Grandfather telling tales of my exploits at my son's age. I guess that is how we learn. All we can hope is that the cap won't slide on the hair gell, over his eyes at a critical moment
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Cogitating on this particular point this p.m. while watching another bunch of youthful proimates lolloping from the video games parlor to their lowered Lancers in metallescent purple I remarked on a further characteristic of the breed which I overlooked earlier. This has to do with what is apparently a uniform requirment to wear jeans (shorts where I live) one size to large at the waist and sans belt, thus exposing the top of the wearer's skivvies. They even have their name visible on these, there seem to be an awful lot of these chaps called Tommy Hilfiger.
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Maybe because they cannot dress themselves. And wont havew the embarrassment of getting their mum to
Ditto about buying clothes.
Kev
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