Yeah I’m looking at longevity I’m buying the car outright, yes I do like the thought of 6 cylinder in the bmw, but it’s that crammed felling over the Tiguan r and service costs/parts thinking the Vw won’t burn a hole in my pocket but could be wrong, and I live on the Isle of Wight where the roads are not very good to say the least, when I look on YouTube about the 340i 95 percent of reviews are in America where they have nice big flat roads, plus I forgot to mention I live on an unmade road which doesn’t help which ever car it is?
Under these circumstances, I wouldn't have either.
For those types of roads I'd be looking at something with supple suspension and tyres of a relatively tall profile. Being an SUV, the Tiguan R might seem like the sensible choice, but that is not necessarily the case. In order to make an SUV handle like a sports car, the suspension tends to be very harsh (unless one of these modern active suspension systems, which I'm pretty sure the Tiguan R hasn't). In combination with ultra low profile tyres, bumpy, ill-maintained, pot-holed roads could be disastrous for your bank balance!.
As for reliability, neither BMW or VW are exactly covered in glory here, though BMW's do seem to be at their most reliable when mated to a 6 cyl engine. Really wouldn't be looking at a DSG gearbox either if longevity is a key requirement. That isn't to say they can't be reliable, and assuming you don't drive like a loon(!), buying one new is giving you the best chance, but I still wouldn't.
One last thing. I've never been to the Isle of Wight, but going by what you've said and what I've seen on Google Maps/Street view, I'm not sure how much use a 300bhp+ car will be to you unless you spend a lot of time outwith the Isle of Wight!.
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