None of my cars has been as bad as that, but if I had to nominate one, it would probably be the 1988 Nissan Prairie.

Nissan Serena 8 seater minibus with a 2.3 D engine. NO turbo. NO go.

Worst car I ever owned was a mk 4 Cortina estate. My own fault. It was a private buy and only when I got it home did the mistake begin to unfold. The only bit of its history I could trace (post-purchase) was that it had at one time been owned by a garage so goodness knows how many drivers it had suffered. It was a 1.6 OHC but it drove more like the 1.3 OHV, performance-wise.

The worst thing about it was that at some point it had had a new diff fitted and it was the wrong ratio, so the speedo reading was about 10mph out, the engine revved very hard at anything like motorway speeds and the diff howled above 50 mph. I could never get the float setting right in the carb and at one point the engine would cut out at speed due to fuel starvation. Very embarrassing at 70 mph in lane 3 of the M3, but fortunately 30-odd years ago the traffic wasn’t what it is today and it was easier to coast over to the hard shoulder (remember those?) where it would re-start straight away.

Its one redeeming feature - and the reason I bought it - was the boot space. At the time we had a new baby, a retriever and a 3 year old and it accommodated all their effects comfortably. I eventually traded it for a Carlton estate - one of the best cars I have ever owned - and expected to get no more than a few hundred £ for it, but to my surprise the salesman offered me £1000. The conversation went like this:

Salesman - So how much do you think the Cortina is worth then?

Me - I have really no idea (thinking ‘maybe a couple of hundred’)

Salesman - Oh come on, you must have a figure in your head....?

Me - No, I promise you. This is my first experience of buying other than privately so I have no idea of the trade-in value

Salesman - Well look, I’m going to write a number on my pad here. I won’t show it to you and that’s going to be my offer, whatever you might say. So how much do you think?

Me - I’m sorry, mate. I wouldn’t know where to start. Honestly.

So he shows me his pad and it says £1000. Well, we’d already decided we wanted the Carlton, so I nearly bit his arm off! I was so glad to be shot of the Cortina and the Carlton was a great buy.

Edited by SLO76 on 14/04/2020 at 15:05

Minis, the originals that is, boneshakers, goodness knows what they would have been like on elastic band tyres.

Rover 2300 SD1, nothing going for it.

Ford Fiesta and Escort with the CVT box, words fail me, Escort with the 1.4 lean burn engine (1.3 was fine), about as much urge as a 3 cylinder Corsa of which i delivered hundreds of ex BSM defleets, getting them on the top deck of a transporter required a run up or the heaps would bog down and die.

Fiat 500 with the automated manual gearbox, possibly even less guts than that awful 1.4 lean burn, even with a run up couldn't make the top deck so was a case of run up till it stalled out just about on the rear deck, then lift deck level and hope you didn't select the wrong gear to move it to its resting spot.

Audi TT, described perfectly by SWMBO like driving a coffin, fast enough but the all round visibility of a tank.

Later Focus', just don't get the hype, cramped bouncy ride just do nothing for me.

Almost all cars i've driven have had good and bad points, it's nice to find the strengths that counter any weaknesses.

Nissan Serena noted above had no go its true, but it did have the turning circle of a black cab which made town driving and parking really easy.

Edited by gordonbennet on 14/04/2020 at 12:12

I'd agree about the Volvo 340. A test drive was enough: the 1.4 engine was fine in the Renault 5 that SWMBO had at the time (mid-1980s) but hopelessly underpowered in the heavy 340. And the ferociously heavy non-assisted steering must have been a nightmare for the OAPs who often bought it.

You never tried the 360 then? Even heavier (non assisted) on 155/13 tyres.

Hunslet Scootacar. 200cc, totally unstable and went wherever it wanted in crosswind. My only excuse for buying it was (slightly) drier in the rain.

Austin Metro 1.0, dreadfully underpowered, could barely manage 55 mph. My own Mini 1275GT, I spent more time under it than in it. But I loved it!

My own Metro 1.3, simply the most unreliable and poorly built thing I've ever owned. The drivers seat fell apart, it needed points and condenser every 6 months, it drank oil, about 300 miles a pint. When it was 3 years old I put my finger through the wing, it had rusted through, I traded it for an Astra 1.3, one of my favourite cars I've owned.I vowed to never own another BMC/Rover.

On loan, a Bmw 1 Series, the most uncomfortable seat, closely followed by the Audi TT, impossible to live with such an awful ride.

A hired Vauxhall Corsa Easytonic, so slow it was dangerous.

Of hundreds of cars driven, only those stand out as particularly awful in some aspect. Most have been fine.

New cars driven, not owned:

Working as a Marketing Consultant in the early '90's, I had the misfortune to do a mystery shopper excercise for a car dealer which sold awful, awful brands.

The Yogo Sana was horrible. The Mahindra Jeep was possibly even worse. I seem to remember the roof was like some kid's tent with metal poles sticking out everywhere.

Early '80's was working in university holidays at a BL/Jag/Rover/Triumph dealer as a new/used car valeter and got to drive all kinds of cars round the block (and a bit further if nobody was looking).

The original MG Maestro 1.6 was awful. Once warm, the carb engine often wouldn't start even when brand new, the gearbox was horrendously notchy and stiff and of course that comedic electronic dashboard was a nightmare.

As SLO says the later 2.0 EFi engine and different gearbox transformed it.

I was loaned a Seat Marbella and it was awful, no power, terrible ride and built out of bean cans.

I once took one of those past the speedometer limit going down a long straight hill. It felt very fast and not a little nerve wracking...

Nothing can compare with a Moskvich saloon. Awful steering , gearbox and fuel consumption around 18mpg.

Gear lever comes away in your hand and awful smell of plastic. When you think the UK got the best of the bunch and in Moscow customers entitled to buy one we’re taken to a compound where they spent a few hours choosing the best of the bunch or one that at least started.

lada , that was luxury. But I heard the Wartburg wasn’t as bad , except for the two stroke fumes ?

No contest for me - a 1966 Ford Bronco (a US Land-Rover / Jeep imitation) that I had in East Africa.

From the vacuum operated wipers which ran out of puff (or suction) when most needed in tropical rain-storms when climbing a dangerous escarpment "road", to its unforgettable (and potentially lethal) habit of the rear wheels attempting to overtake the front - it took me off road into the bush too many times!

Of all the horrible scrapyard dodgers and designer's disaster's I have been "privileged" to drive in my 52 year driving career I have a particular hatred for the pool car that nobody wanted to drive, so it got dished out to me as the junior service engineer, as my company car. The 1970 Hillman Avenger 1300. It just never did feel right, horrible steering, horrible noisy buzz from the d*****ine at motorway flat out speed, which was most of the time. It had the unnerving habit of jumping out of top (fourth) gear when flat out. Also, the 6 inch diameter rubber spongy thing in the steering wheel boss used to regularly jump out and land in your lap.

Late 1990s I had Focus Mk1 1.8, an amazing car for the money. Someone decided to run into it and the first courtesy car I was given was a Corsa 1.0. Truly terrible. The bodyshop then rang and asked if I could drive autos as they needed to swap the Corsa with someone who would only drive manuals.

In anticipation of something decent I was given a Hyundai Accent 1.3 auto! It was like getting into a 1970s Datsun and had absolutely no power whatsoever.

MG BGT

HEAVY steering, little go, doors felt tinny, HUGE turning circle.

It was by far the worst car I have ever drive,, promised performance - gave nothing...

We'd just moved to Kenya, and I needed a 4x4 for going into the country exploring.

I went to see a rangerover mk1 which had been 'rebuilt'. It was an absolute dog. About 4" of play in the steering, wouldn't keep to a straight line. Brakes were uneven. Engine was dripping oil. THe dodgiest respray I've ever seen.

I stopped after about 100 yards and took it back. I couldn't run away fast enough.

Bought a Mitsubishi Shogun instead.

Bought a Mitsubishi Shogun instead.

Probably badged a Pajero in Kenya ... problem was they were so desirable in Nairobbery that they were always getting stolen :-)

Morris Marina. Can't immediately think of any redeeming features - perhaps a large boot on the saloon?

1800 you can drop the sump in about 10 minutes, and can remove pistons without taking the engine out.

One Lada owner near me who was a teacher was mercilessly taunted by his students about his choice of car.

But he had the last laugh when he found a note on the windscreen one day asking him to sell, which he did.

The cars were being shipped back to Russia where they were in demand because locals realised that exported cars were the pick of the production with less faults.

He was at last vindicated . But i wonder what happened to Satra Motors the UK importers in Bridlington ?

1981 Escort mk3 1.3gl a putrid horrid orange sometimes mobile heap of rust.

When I passed my test in 1980, I drove dad's Marina 1.8 estate (in mustard orange). The steering response was a bit lethargic and it would wallow in an alarming way. I later found his Fiat 126 to be far more fun. Foot flat to the floor all the time. There's something about a low-powered little car that is very enjoyable - James Hunt was quite fond of his Austin A35 I think. I even found my 2CV to be better than that Marina.

I’ve had more fun at the wheel of simple lightweight fwd hatchbacks on skinny tyres than sports cars. One of the most enjoyable drives of my life involved a trip up the A82 to Fort Augustus in a 999cc Fiat UNO 45 Fire. Foot to the floor joy with a rev happy engine and a gearbox with five perfectly spaced ratios.

In four decades I have driven a lot of cars particularly between the late seventies to mid nineties when I used pool cars and then a company car. Some such as a Mk IV Zephyr 6 and an Austin Metro were far better than the press made out. Others had niggles such as the heavy steering of a Lada Riva or the sheer gutlessness of a non-turbo diesel Cavalier. However the one that stands out at being truly awful was a Talbot Solara. It was a hire car as the company had run out of pool cars. It was on a three day hire for a business trip with a work colleague. I drove it for the duration as after ten minutes he declared it undriveable! The gear change was vague and clunky, and linked to a vicious on/off clutch. To add to this the steering was imprecise and the brakes poor. Was I glad to give it back! A few months later I drove its big brother the Tagora. Again a far better car than the press made out but up against stiff competition from Ford and Vauxhall.

Edited by RaineMan on 06/05/2020 at 07:34

Nissan serena 2.3 diesels complete lack of any power takes some beating

Our Finance Director bought our department (estates maintenace) a couple of LDV Cubs (which were rebadged Serenas) back in about 2000. They were brilliant compared to the Beford Rascals they replaced.

At the same time they had a Serena people carrier at the wifes place which took all the abuse they threw at it, something the Peugeot Boxer that replaced it failed at totally.